Let's Play: Animal Crossing Pocket Camp!

Hey, so if any of you were wondering what has consumed my life this past week. Look no further than this free app based on my favourite game from childhood. Animal Crossing!! And because it so happens to coincide with the video week, I have made a little video showing my first look at the game. Enjoy!

See you when I see you!

Primark Haul.

Hey everybody, so today we are going to have a different post to the usual stuff. Thought I’d mix it up a bit. Keep things fresh. So today we are going to be doing a small haul post, because the other weekend I went shopping in Cambridge. I mainly went and purchased stuff in there Primark, but I thought it would make a cute little post, as when you run out of creative ideas, you’ve got to take every chance you get. Plus, there isn’t much to do on my way home on the train, so I started drafting the post.#

Now I love Primark, essentially everything I own comes from there, because it’s cute and affordable. However, I hate shopping in Primark because (the one in Norwich in particular) is chaos. But once you understand how to manipulate that chaos, it’s fine, and you get some very lovely clothes. For me those lovely clothes fall under three categories: Checked shirts, and jumpers. If you are lucky some kind of combination of those. I considered this trip a lucky one.

So, here’s what I got. Quick note, sorry about the pictures, but I didn’t really know how to pose, and Matt was being annoying with the camera. Anyway…

 First, we have, what I didn’t realise until I read the receipt, A Woollen Boyfriend. It’s basically a checked shirt dress I can sleep in. And I am wearing it with jeans in the picture just because I hate my legs. I love the colours, the pattern and how comfortable it is. Plus, one thing I love is being lazy and wearing pyjamas and now I can bring in my love of checked shirts so it’s a win all round.

Next, we have a Cable Jumper, because I need more jumpers in my life to keep me warm. Plus, it was a plain colour and one of the few jumpers that didn’t have weird rip holes in it or some kind of other strange décor. Like ribbon? Anway, cute, cosy let’s move on.

This was one of those lovely finds, a checked shirt dress. I love the colours, and I didn’t realise it came with a belt until I took it from the rail. I love a good belt. However, there aren’t enough holes, so it is basically pointless as a waisted belt. Also, I bought a size 14 which I thought would fit and it did, until I buttoned down to the hips, which is why I have left it unbuttoned. But I guess I can use the fact it doesn’t fully fit as goal to lose weight. Because I cannot be bothered to exchange it.

Lastly, we have my favourite thing. The jumper checked shirt combo. A way to look casually smart, and just like Elli. It’s so comfortable, and I love the colours of it. I didn’t realise that there is a tiny pattern of holes along the front and back, which if stretched could become a bit…revealing. But overall I really love this piece.

To accompany all the clothes, I just bought some High waisted black skinny jeans, because they are so comfortable, and some black leggings. Sense the theme. I also bought underwear but there is no way I am posting that on the blog. Maybe if you are lucky you can see it in real life 😉 No that’s not even a funny joke…

Anyway, thank you for reading this little post of something new. I hope it was a good distraction. I shall see you when I see you!

Let Downs + Sims 4

Hey there.

So I had a plan for this post. It was the traditional video upload, and I was like I will play sims because the new expansion pack was released last week and I could show my opinions. But everything has just seemed to fuck up. I've had stressful times at work. The audio of the first recording sucked. I rushed to record a second one. Have spent days recording so already missing the deadline I set for myself so it has annoyed me. So I was like well as long as it's up for when I post my blog. But no. Everything is crashing, everything is failing me. I'm at the brink of crying because it's stressing me out, because in all honesty the video probably isn't even worth the fucking effort.

I'm sorry there is nothing of interest. But let's face it. You aren't real. This is just me putting pressure on myself. So it should just be dealt with.

Hopefully something more interesting next week.

Sorry.

See you when I see you.

So here is the video. Totally not worth the wait, which is why I am not designating it it's own post anymore.

I'm Not Okay (I Promise).

Right now I feel this song accurately represents my life. Yeah I have no worries about the photos my boyfriend took, I don't really get dirty looks, and I haven't broken my foot from jumping out the second floor. But I am not okay, yet I say I am. Now that may be confusing, because things were looking up for me. I caught up with coursework, work was less stressful, I started a diet plan to improve my life, and I was sorting out my room. So as you guess from the title there is a massive but lingering somewhere. 

Well you are wrong...

However (see how I got you), this past week and a half I have been super worried about it all going kaput. Why? Because I worked a fuck tonne, so when I came home I did no coursework. Fair to me I decided to do it at the weekend. My plan, see friends for Fireworks on Friday, then crack down to sort out room Saturday and do coursework on Sunday. And it never happened. Instead I binged watched Atypical on Netflix (which you should all go watch by the way) and the most achievement I got with my room was moving my bed like a foot to the right. So I'm worried. Worried that my plan to keep on track, sort out my life is going up in smoke. And I just don't know how to be okay anymore. 

It started on Halloween. Yeah I got to dress up at work, I carved some super cute pumpkins but work was stressful to a point I got angry, couldn't explain it and just burst into tears. Then proceeded to eat like half a jar of Nutella, which when you are trying to diet isn't the best thing to do. So what happened? I felt more shit. The week that followed was just more of a shit show. Coming home stressed and just wanting to binge on food and panicking that I would not be able to get to the place I want to be. Which currently is happy. Don't get me wrong I enjoyed Friday seeing my friends, yeah I was super tired and cranky but they really did help. Problem is I can't see them everyday. Same with Matt, yeah we call, but it's not the same as him physically being here to cuddle it all away. 

So what do I do, because I feel like no matter what I try I am looping back to this stage of unhappiness. And it's all linked to time. If I don't do it now, when will I do it? And the fact I am failing now means I will always fail. I have to try and get out of this mental state, but it is really difficult. And it's like do I just keep trying to keep having cycles of feeling ultimate shitness, or do I give up and think, well fuck it. But then still be upset with my life because the plans were to fix my insecurities. I just need to magically become a better human being. 

However, this isn't the entirety of my life, there are good days. Yeah I'm not experiencing many right now, and am at the point where I don't think they'll come back. But I think knowing there are good times, is why you do the thing of "I'm Okay" because you think it will just go away, not be a problem anymore. Or at least, you hope. Right now I'm running out of hope. Which is why I felt the need to post this. Because maybe blurting it all out in some nonsense text will help cleanse my mind. Who knows? 

So I'm sorry this was a really weird one, and congrats to you if you read through the whole thing. Unfortunately there is no prize. So double sorry. 

I shall see you when I see you!

DIY: Pumpkin Carving.

Yes more Halloween themed content, because you can never get enough spooks. To top this off we have my scary attempt at carving my own pumpkin which...was...well...just watch the video!

Sorry.
See you when I see you!

In This Town Of Halloween.

Hello everybody, and as you should all probably be aware by now, next Tuesday it's Halloween! Yay! Personally I love Halloween, because it's a chance to dress up and have fun. Hence this marvelous post about my favourite holiday.

Considering it is my favourite, I'm not very good at celebrating it. I wasn't a big decorate my house person, or a thinking of extravagant costumes, and I very rarely took part in trick or treating and attending fancy dress parties. Despite this I do remember moments of the few times. Personally I seem to remember no earlier Halloween experience since before I started high school. Maybe they were that traumatic, but here we go. 

Pointless confession time, because you read this after I write it so if I never mentioned it you'd never know it happened, but I'm going to confess anyway because that's just the person I am. Basically I was writing out a long post about all what I remember from Halloween, when I discovered I have actually done a blog post 3 years ago with the same thing. So I wasted a bit of time. But if you would like to read these for yourself you are more than welcome to click here. Then if you would like to read about Halloween of 2014 you can click here too. Even though it wasn't really that exciting a post. 

I guess the logical thing to do now is talk about the Halloweens since then. But there have only been two, and from what I recall I spent 2015 just hanging with my sister watching movies, and 2016 I went to a work colleagues and just chatted and had drinks. I feel like my whole plan for this post has gone out of the window. Well I guess I can still talk about what I am going to be doing this Halloween. Wait...I have no plans. So far it's just going to work. To be fair Halloween is a weekday and I need to be responsible. I think I'm going to dress up as a witch, I know super creative. But I work with children so I can't be anything too scary or inappropriate. Therefore, my options are very limiting. I have thought about dressing up in just a general costume, like I have a casual Ariel costume, but I feel I would stand out, and I hate feeling like that sometimes. 

I do love all the gory make-up things I see on the internet though, and I think that I am going to teach myself how to do that, and host my own Halloween party. But I think it may be some time before I get to that stage. 

Well I've run out of things to talk about, sorry this wasn't very good, but like I said you can go back and read my other Halloween posts to keep you distracted from responsibilities. I know that's what I am going to do!

See you when I see you!

Talk: Sleepy Time.

Hey guys, basically this video is a very last minute planned talk about something I had actually planned to blog about but on a much briefer scale. It's not great so you have been warned. If you would like to read the slightly more detailed ramblings I have kept them in the post, so you can try a piece together more of an idea about what I am on about. But enjoy staring at my pudgy face, which I know you all love so much.

So I've been facing a problem for a few months now, which is as the title states. I struggle with sleeping. And to be honest I probably do understand the reasons for it. It's because I wake up at 6.30 to get ready and go to work, I'm there for about 9 hours and then it's on my journey home I get really tired. But when home I eat and watch TV with family, and by the time I make it up to my bed. I'm not tired anymore. And then I end up sleeping around 1am and having to be awake. One day I literally when to sleep at 4am. But it's not like I can lay in the next day. So I'm stuck in a vicious loop.

However fairly recently, my internet has been playing up, so I almost force myself to fall asleep, because there simply isn't that much else to do, and it is working pretty well. But I think I have mentioned in a vlog one time, that my mind likes to think about the most bizarre things at the most inconvenient times. So when I should be asleep, I'm actually planning blog posts or youtube videos. Or I'm designing how to decorate my room, or what my future flat will look like. Or I'm thinking about coursework/work related things. Yet nothing is actually getting accomplished. 

I don't think I get a lack of sleep to the point I need medication for it, because I do feel fine, it's just more annoying because I fear about being really tired for work, and considering the type of job I do, being awake and alert is a rather big deal. But then again sometimes I think me thinking about how that might happen is another reason I am not sleeping. It's weird. 

One of the weirdest things though is how I am now incapable of having a lay in. Unless I am with Matthew, I think it's because I feel comfortable with him. Anyway. At the time of writing this I have woken up at 5am, and it's Sunday. Like what?! I have tried going back to sleep, and it just isn't happening. When I was younger, I used to never see morning on a Sunday. I would go down to have a weird lunch type breakfast and my parents would joke about how I'm alive. The only perks of this I guess is that I am now being more productive in my day. I've already done some coursework and am now writing this blog. Yesterday I did some coursework and sorted out part of my bedroom. So I guess I can't complain fully. 

I do hope that my sleeping pattern regains some normality, but I guess we'll just have to see. I'm sorry this post is a bit shorter than usual, and really weird, but I'm running out of content as you can tell. Maybe it's the weird amounts of sleep I get. Anyway... See you when I see you!

Aspirations.

Hey everybody, so recently I have been thinking a lot about where I want to be. I mean I think about this all the time especially around new years, but the past week or so has been a real. I want this. So what better thing to discuss in this blog post? For some of these aspirations we actually have to give a little back story. So bare with me.

Firstly I think everyone knows that I want to move out. This is for different reasons. Wanting my own space to allow me to be more productive and social, but mainly it's because I am somewhat ashamed of where I live now. I have lived in this house my whole life, and honestly I have not treated it like a home, I know this when I go to other people's and see how nice everything looks. And I want to change this. But the problem was that for years it built and built to be... well.. a shit hole. Then when I finally wanted to change it, it got to the point of being too much. The idea was crazy. So basically I went for if I move out. I have that clean slate, a place I can be proud of. However, as I have mentioned a few times, I am not financially able to do this.

Anyway, I finally had some time off work and thought, I am going to tackle this beast, well of my room anyway.  So I did. And I had a stressed out breakdown. Because there was so much crap hidden under the bed and in the cupboard, I just started running out of places to organise the mess. And I'm very perfectionist when I do something, and the fact that I couldn't complete something because of something made me very like I don't want to do this anymore. But once you start a task like this you might as well finish. However, I thought to myself that even once these places are tidy. I'm still not going to be happy in this room. because it's not the masses of stuff that made it a horrible mess, it's the room itself. The walls, the floor, the furniture. So I spoke to my good ol' father and he said we can try to fix these. Therefore, I am now in my extreme planning mind. The plan is to get rid of all the crap I don't want anymore. Once that is gone, I can sort out the remaining things a lot better. Dad said he is going to help cut off parts of my bed. Because it has these really weird poles that don't actually do anything. And we're going to upgrade my furniture, and hopefully repaint my room. I also want to either get a large rug or re-carpet, haven't thought enough into it yet. 

However, these ideas to me are dangerous. because I end up getting all hyped up over things going a particular way, I have a really hard fall, because from experience something goes wrong. But I have to try and think positively, and hopefully it will pay off, and I can have a room I am proud of so maybe I can save some more money to not move out right now, and I can spend it on a holiday or something. However, now I don't have that time off work anymore, and I have to try and continue with making the space better and I just feel I am not going to stick with it.

Do not fear you will find out how this goes, and I am sorry that this post, and probably that post, is weird. But you've read the title of this blog, what else do you expect? Common. I'll see you when I see you.

Dramatic Reading: Everyday.

Yep, it's time to snuggle down and cringe your heart out, because I've made another video. Well done to me for being consistent. So I don't know why but I decided an interesting concept would be to just read sections of a book in a somewhat dramatic fashion. But this is more seen to be believed. So just watch. Sneaky plug: There is a blog post about my opinions on this wonderful book if you fancy a read, just click here!
Also if you feel that didn't cringe you out enough, you can also watch the Annie video I mention here! But warning it is 5 years old and insanely bad.

See you when I see you!

Then Vs Now.

Then (Somewhere around November 2013) 

Now (27/09/17)

Heya. Today's post we are going to be making comparisons between my past and present self.
Because I am a very nostalgic person and love looking back on my life which leads to the thoughts, Wow how much has changed. Whether it has been the past year or decade, I am certainly changing. For the better? I am never quite sure, but join me on this journey to see some weird experiences.

So let's look back at my first blog post. And the first striking difference is the colour scheme. I changed this mainly because I was too lazy to go back through after writing the post to adjust the sizes and alter the colours. But also, people told me it got difficult to read. I'm pretty sure my background used to be different and I changed it  a few times, and ultimately settled on the pencils. Because I just love the aesthetic.

In this first post I talk about obsessions. Yeah I still say I am obsessed with youtube, but I don't really watch those gaming channels anymore. And the youtubers I am interested in have changed a lot. Currently I love Liza Koshy and David Dobrik. The Try Guys will always entertain me. And I could never give up on my Dan and Phil. I still have my own youtube channel but it's not the same one I am referring to. And this is more of a solo one, where I plan it, more than just film whatever is happening. I do miss doing that though, because watching back the memories with my friends was super cute. However I guess now we aren't teens it feels a bit weird.

Moving on... I talk about being obsessed with tea sets, and don't get me wrong I still love a good tea set, but my obsessions have progressed on from that. To blott rubbers, my little pony, tsum tsums and funko pops. You can read all about these in this handy little blog post link.

Now there is the lost of my favourite things, and I guess I still do love these things, some not as much as I used to, but there are definitely additions to this, like Game of Thrones, the above mentioned obsessions, and new music artists like Melanie Martinez and Shawn Mendes. Yes I am aware they are two completely different styles, but you need to know my music is very ranged.

I still value family and friendship. But the interesting thing is how the list of friends has changed. which I talk about in the second blog post I make. I mean 6 of the names I mention I don't even talk to anymore. I'm not going to dwell on those, because I have to move on from that, and focus on those who are still putting up with me. It is also interesting how if I were to write that post again, how differently I could talk about some of the people. For instance my friendship with Paige has become so much stronger, and I tell her everything, which I didn't really do before. Plus she's been with me everytime I went clubbing, and it was because of her I even went to a club.

Another difference is that I also have a work friendship group which I'd like to mention. Not that I really see them outside of work much anymore. I mean I'd like to it's just difficult to. But I have so many fun conversations with them, and when I started this blog, I didn't even have a part time job, let alone my full time career I would say. So a definite tick in the reason why now is better than then, is I am actually earning money.

As well I as this, now is definitely better, due to the fact, when I started my blog, I wasn't in the best of places. A situation occurred and I felt really shit about myself, thinking I wasn't good enough. And I can happily say I do not feel like that anymore. Yeah I have my down moments when I get stressed. But nowadays the people who I surround myself with make me feel proud of who I am/trying to become. Because let's face it I'm not perfect, and I am trying to be better, and my awesome friends and family are helping me get there.

So I've grown a lot as a person. Despite not actually getting any taller :'( Oh well I'm a cute little bundle. But I'd say I like where my life has taken me. Yeah I miss those days at the beginning of 6th form, or some times I had in high school. But I can't live in the past. Plus who knows, I may look back at this in another 4ish years and think, wow. What's happened? Hopefully things wouldn't have changed too much. I mean I'd like to have moved out, either have a child or at least be pregnant, still be surrounded by the same awesome people, and be successful in my career choice. But I didn't know I'd be at the point back then, so who knows.

See you when I see you!

Let's Play! Minecraft.

Hello, so yep there is another video. I'm being more consistent! This is basically a fail video of me playing minecraft on my own. To be fair I am this shit when playing with others. It took me like four attempts to make something I am actually half proud of, with nearly 3 hours of filming and the same with editing and the painstaking wait for it to render so please just consider those factors before hating.  Hope you enjoy!

See you when I see you!

Time For An Update.

Hello everybody. Today I thought I would just give more of an update on my life and happenings, as that hasn't really been the case for a while. So yeah, here goes.

Work: If you have been keeping up to date, you would have noticed work had been going a bit downhill. I felt I wasn't being respected in my position, I was constantly stressed and drained, yaddayadda. So I am pleased to announce that this is all improving! I think the whole atmosphere of work has changed, and we seemed to have sorted our shit out, so I do feel much happier. Yeah I still wish you finish when you are told you'd finish, but I guess that is an issue never going to be fixed. But I feel like I am managing a lot better. Coursework is actually getting completed and I'm just not being a complete failure which is always good news. And I re-sat my ICT exam last week, so hopefully I didn't fail that by 6% again. I felt like it was really easy, but am worried that maybe it felt a little too easy, and I have messed up in some massive way. But let's pray I don't have to travel all the way to Bedford again. But yeah, I am getting more organised at work and things are looking good.

Social: I am trying to make more of an effort with my friends. I know it can be difficult organising things, because we have all gone our separate ways and have different responsibilities. But I would like to start putting in more time, because they are the beings that keep me going. For instance last week I tried organising a thing with everyone but only 5 people decided to join me. Don't get me wring I had a great time, I ate pizza, drank some tasty cocktails, and got to act like an idiot with people who love me, and someone who doesn't know me. But he has to deal with me whether he likes it or not. Sometimes I think smaller meet ups are nicer because the quality of time with those people are amazing. Like when Maddy, Matt and I went for ice-cream, we spent hours chatting and organsing a holiday to Disney, which hasn't been discussed since, and I doubt it is going to happen, but I love how we can just go into so much depth talking about random things. But I would love to see some more of my friends soon because it keeps me happy.

Personal: Following the dream planning of a holiday to Disneyworld, it actually got me thinking a lot more about going on holidays, out of this country. And after learning that Naples in Italy is the Nutella capital of the world (I love Nutella by the way) I was thinking a lot about braving my fear of planes and going somewhere and exploring. And Italy is more affordable than Disneyworld. But these are probably just fantasies. Keeping with that theme, learning to drive and moving out remain on the wishlist but wont be an actuality for another year or so, which does stress me out because I have a fear of time. Like if I keep pushing it back what if something happens to prevent it, and I become unhappy and trapped. I think it is a reason I don't sleep very well, because I keep having these worries about time pressure. And then the fact I can't sleep makes me panic more because usually I have work the next day and I can't push that back to sleep so then I get tired and there is nothing I can really do about it. Plus when I can't sleep, I think about how I should probably use this time to be productive like doing coursework, or working on blog posts and things, so that way I feel I am at least getting something done. It's a weird system. But I do feel out of everything in my life, I put my dreams and well-being last. Like I'd rather please the people at work, or my family and friends, over what I want to do. Which is good because in that sense I'm not selfish, but I feel it makes me stressed out. But then again the things I want to do aren't exactly things I am capable of doing. Because I have essentially been told I cannot move out, because I do not have a high enough salary, and literally none of my friends want to move in with me, and I feel moving in with strangers is just going to be like living with my parents. Or I want to do more creative things, but simply do not have the time or energy. We shall see.

Sorry this was a bit of a weird post, but I thought that I haven't really done an updatey post in a while, and it is nice to have this kind of vent in a way, because it can help organise my thoughts. So yeah thanks for reading.

See you when I see you!

Game Of Thrones.

Hello, as season 7 has drawn to a close, I give my opinion on the various characters and plot points of the series. But in the fun way of a video! So sit back, waste some time, cringe at my existence.

See you when I see you!

Emma.

Hello everybody, welcome back to the zone of avoiding responsibilities. If you came in hopes of reading something random and pointless, you have reached your destination. Today's post has a bit of back story before we get into the real heart of it. So when I was hanging out with my friends (which you can read about in this strategically placed link to a previous blog post) myself and my fellow bloggers were talking about blog ideas, when the magnificent Emma piped up saying we should all write a post about her. Thus here I am, sticking to my word.

Over my 20 years of life I have known a lot of Emma's, my hairdresser is called Emma, Matt's sister is called Emma, and there was a number of other people my sister and I knew who had that name. Making telling a story very difficult. But none of them are as awesome as the Emma I am going to tell you about. I have known Emma for about 15 years, which is crazy because that is 3/4's of my life. And from what I remember she hasn't really changed. When you see old photographs of her she is the same, just more mature looking, and probably taller. Even though I guess you can't really see that in a photo unless they are standing by objects.






Anywho, everyone needs a friend like Emma, because she is one of the kindest people you would ever meet. And extremely loyal. Remember she's been friends with me for this long. That's commitment. The good thing about our friendship as well is we both respect how busy the other can get, and don't get moody about how long it can take to respond or talk, we just have catch ups every now and then. It feels like we have never been apart.














A great thing about Emma is how we can obsess over cats with each other, sharing cute pictures and stories about our own pets, or memes and things from the internet. To be fair you can send Emma practically anything (within reason) and she responds like it is the greatest thing she has ever seen. I can guarantee that there will be an emoticon in the response she gives as well. She uses it as punctuation.














Emma is extremely smart, and crazy talented. I am jealous of her ice skating abilities! And I do aspire to be more like Emma, because she's at Oxford for crying out loud. Real role model material. Even though it took her a while to figure out the correct way to fill a kettle....











Sorry this is a really weird and short post, but I am running out of content and I wanted to stick to a promise I made to a good friend.
















See you when I see you!

Who Am I?

I know it's weird to think that after nearly 4 years of blogging we are only just asking this question, but do not worry there is method to my madness. That madness being, I'm vlogging again! I've always wanted to go back to vlogging and in my mind, I was going to wait until I moved out. But at this rate that isn't going to happen for a while, so if I keep pushing it back I am never going to start back up again. So this is basically my reboot introduction video, and I'm thinking about posting them every other week, because I won't be able to post both on here and there every week. I'm not that creative. But I will always link to my video on here so you get that little something extra. This video also throws back to a previous post of mine so if you wanted to read that you can check it out here!

I hope you enjoy this weirdness and it keeps you distracted from your responsibilities, much like it is doing with me.

See you when I see you!

Social Excuses.

Hello everybody. So you're probably happy to read that this post will not be about my holiday. YAY something different! And it is in fact about hanging out with a few of my friends. Because they are so awesome. And I do not make enough time to be with them. Luckily I had Lish to message asking if I was free, and I pretty much was, so it can be as simple as that. Anyway, the group was myself, Lish, Siobhan, Paige, Emma and Amy who joined together to listen to Jordan's band play at music fest. Which is a cool way for us to meet up, because we get to have a laugh and dance, catch up and gossip. Therefore making me happy. I mean sometimes it is difficult to talk whilst there is music blaring out, and sometimes it would be nice to have a more private catch up, but I still had fun and this was easier to organise. Despite the fact that none of us really knew where the place was.

Thankfully, I was not the one who was driving, that was left to Emma. And she dragged me to basically everyone's house, and we shared a secret about songs we enjoyed and just chatted about recent events. Then Lish and Siobhan joined the party, to get Paige, and we had lots of gossip time, and joking about how much I love to gossip. But not much happens in my life so I need to get the low down on everyone else. One the way we listened and sang along to music and got a little confused about where to park, but Jordan doing a beautiful job of directing us to a parking spot, and Amy did a marvelous job directing us to Jordan. 

So we stood at the entrance having a little natter, being deafened by some music. I got amazed by there being a double decker bus. Then losing my shit because it was actually a bar. Before realising I didn't have enough money on me to buy a drink. I wasn't given much information on what this event was really like ok. My only info was there was a bouncy castle. We then found a little spot to claim and waited for Jordan to begin his set. And we all had a go at bottle flipping. It was all essentially a failure, until Paige managed to do it. We we all very impressed. especially when the second time it fell over and got back up. Then eventually she completely gave up and almost hit passers by.

Emma then provided us with a handy picnic blanket and we all sat and had a little grove on the floor, because we were saving our energy for when Jordan's band played. It was pretty good, but I didn't know many of the songs. But when Enigma started playing I got more into it because after seeing them a few times now I knew what was playing. It was good fun especially when the group started making their own dance routine to Livin' on a Prayer.  I get to shout DALATDA in Siobhan's face which she loves ;) And we get to catch up and gossip.

Some of the best moments were the dancing, and sometimes I can feel a bit awkward in these situations, but luckily the group has Amy, who will just dance on her own. So it's great to join in with some of her crazy moves because at least you're not alone. I have quite a few videos of Amy dancing like this, and I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one. It's why we love her so much. But then the band finished playing so we gave up with dancing for a bit, and just sat listening to music. Having a bitch about things, and also discussing things we were looking forward to.

Then we decided we were in the mood for a McDonald's, so the hang out continued to a new location. We first split off into the different cars, and Lish and I chose songs to play alternatively, but all that were good. Then we played some together and made a weird mash up of Shawn Mendes, and some guy I have already forgotten the name of, but it didn't actually turn out that bad. We were having tonnes of fun until Amy thought we had gotten lost because we took forever to drive there. Sorry, but I was super comfortable in the back with my little cuddle blanket, snuggled in the middle of Lish and Paige. McDonald's can wait.

But we got there and I got excited because our friend who worked there was on shift. So we found a place to sit, and then we moved because there was a seat with more room,and we just chat and ate Mcdonalds. And Jordan ate a lot of McDonald's, he just kept getting back up to order more. It was incredible. I had lots of fun talking about the plans I have and comparing them with Siobhan, and we also spoke about blog post ideas with Lish. Amy and Jordan then left as they had to get ready for a holiday (I will miss you guys! Have lots of fun) The rest of us stayed a little longer chitchatting before I said what everyone was thinking which was. I love you guys, but I'm tired. And we had a fun drive home.

I'm really glad I went to this little get together, because I do miss these guys a lot, and do feel I could spend more time than I do with them. But organising stuff (especially this time of year) can be tricky. I need to see the others in my group as well, because it's been so long! I think I just get worried that if I see them too regularly I will run out of things to talk about, because my life isn't very entertaining. As you can probably tell when you read these blog posts. But I'm going to try and make things more exciting. Key word is Try there guys. Ah I love the Try Guys. That's entertainment. You should go watch them instead of continuing to read this.

Go on it's okay I don't mind.

I'm watching them too.

See you when I see you!

Mad Adventures.

You can tell I'm starting to run out of content, because I'm spreading 9 days of holiday into 3 blog posts. But I'm sorry! It's just my life can be quite uneventful, and this was an eventful time so I thought I would make it last a little longer. Fear not though chums, for this post is not going to be the usual, read my bizarreness, instead it is going to be a watch this video! YES I'VE MADE A NEW VIDEO FOR THE  FIRST TIME IN LIKE MONTHS. But this was a special occasion after all. I hope it's not shit (we all know it is) and yeah, enjoy the 1 hour 20minutes worth of footage I manage to condense down to 4. Congrats to me for editing this.

Holiday Antics (Continued)

Hey. If you are a regular to my blog (or have read the title) you would know that I was on holiday last week, and that I had never actually gotten around to telling you about the remainder of my trip. So, if you are new I suggest checking out the beginning of the holiday here.

Are you all caught up? Good I can begin… well continue. You know what I mean.

Matt and I woke up in our hotel and had some breakfast before taking a fifteen-minute drive up to Spey Bay. Here is supposedly a good spot for seeing Dolphins and a few other wildlife, but we didn’t care about that as much as the dolphins. When we got there, it was cold but the scenery was lovely. No sign of any wildlife though. And the rain started, so actually spotting something didn’t seem very likely. Which was a little disappointing. We walked around to a little river which a map said you could see Otters, and then walked along a mud section, where my docs got a little ruined and I almost got stuck and fell over. We survived making it over to some stones and walked along the beach looking out for seals more otters and dolphins. And we just kept looking. Until we got sad by the rain and decided enough was enough. It was too disheartening because I guess if the weather was nicer there is still no guarantee of seeing anything. But again, if the weather was nicer we would have spent more time there. I still had a nice time though, collected lots of stones, and bought some nice things from the gift shop. I also ate a delicious flapjack.

Thus, we headed back to the hotel, and just had a chilled afternoon playing Sims. We did plan to go back out and look at this local castle, but we didn’t stick to the plan. Plus, it’s our holiday if we want to stay in we can do. I paid for that hotel, make the most of it. We then got food and started packing away our stuff, leading into the journey back down to Edinburgh, which apart from the pretty views, random chats and me serenading my poor companion. We also hit 20000 miles in Matthews car on the journey so he was pleased.

Edinburgh itself wasn’t extremely eventful, it was just a nice little shopping trip in a mall type place and I went into the Disney store. I was hoping I could get a Scottish themed Mickey mouse but I guess their minds do not work like mine. I still got some cute things though. Matt and I also got some delicious ice cream from a campervan shaped stall. I had Ferrero and Kinder. The two only worthy flavours. Matt had chocolate fudge brownie which was also tempting. More chilling at the hotel watching Try Guy YouTube videos which lead to Matt trying to put eyeliner on me. You can see the attempt located to the left of the screen.

Next day was when we left Scotland on a drive through some weird place names that we made fun of, and headed down to Scarborough. The afternoon was chilled (I’m allowed to relax on my holiday okay!) Having some yummy food in the restaurant of the hotel and just enjoying each other’s company, watching weird videos and playing sims. You know things you can do at home for less money. Plus, the following day is where the fun is at.

So, we started having a walk along the beach, I got excited by donkeys and the premise of going on a Pirate Ship across the sea, but Matt wouldn’t let me. We saw a pretty castle, and again saw some lovely views, before venturing to Peasholm Park. Here Matt and I attempted rowing around the river, then stopped for some food, had a little walk around and then went on the almighty dragon pedalos. Which really hurt my legs, and Matthew was dying because it was a small space for someone who is 6ft2. Following this, we treated ourselves to a fake calippo and went around the shops. After some food at the hotel, we returned to the beach, and I splashed around in the sea, and convinced Matthew to paddle along with me, but as it was getting colder we didn’t spend long there and went back to settle in the hotel.

However, around 11pm circumstances had other ideas. And as we were on the brink of being asleep. The fire alarm went off. So, the whole hotel had to evacuate and wait in the car park for like 20 minutes. Then I couldn’t get to sleep because there was too much fucking noise everywhere. SEAGULLS!!! Eventually I got to sleep and was having a lovely time. However, at 7am circumstances had other ideas. I was woken up by a fire alarm, and this morning was way colder than the previous night I was freezing! Then all the guests went to go and have breakfast so we went back to the room to chill and wait for the chaos to die down a bit. Breakfast was good, then it was just the travel home, which made me sad.

I had such a good week with Matthew, and I am so grateful to him for spending all this time with me, and driving us up there. Because even though he got moody I do understand why, and I don’t love him any less for it. I have so many memories and some lovely keepsakes. I am so proud of myself for stepping out of my comfort zone of being in a strange place away from my parents, and being (somewhat) responsible.

Thank you, guys, for reading through this. I hope it was worth it, but I know this is a piece of shit.

See you when I see you!

My First Adult Holiday.

So, this might be an insanely long post, or not depends how lazy I get. Which is very likely. But this post as you can tell from the title, is about my first holiday away from my parents. It’s terrifying. I had to book it all myself which makes me very nervous because what if something goes wrong. Which is very likely.

Now partly because we are poor, and partly because I don’t have a passport, and partly because I have a serious fear of flying, we decided to stay in the United Kingdom. And Matt offered to drive. Stupid. Because I decided that I wanted to go to Scotland. Well we agreed together, as it was somewhere neither of us had been before so the thrill was in the Adventure. ADVENTURE IS OUT THERE! Stupid. Because I forget I have a slight anxiety over getting lost. But I had the belief that Matthew would take care of me and all would be well.

Because I had no idea on what there was to do in Scotland I felt we couldn’t dedicate the whole week to it, plus we’d have to stop on the way if Matthew is driving the whole way up. Therefore, I first stop was Whitby. The drive up was pretty good, and Matt enjoyed some of the roads, only problem being when we got in Whitby and Matt hated how pedestrians used the road as a path, and there was lots of traffic, and practically no parking. But once we got inside the hotel and had a rest, and watched Game of Thrones, we ventured on a little explore and had a lovely night. Then the next morning we tried going in a shop my mum wanted me to go in, but even though they said they were open they were closed. Annoying. So, the journey to Scotland commenced.

Now I have never experienced car Sickness before, but there was just this whole messed up period on the motorway where I had the worst headache, a sore throat, a sickness feeling, and to top it all off I needed to pee. Like Bad. Luckily, we weren’t that far away from a roundabout that had a McDonalds. And we got back on the road after some food and rest. Now the views guys, were incredible. I tried to film or take pictures but honestly the camera doesn’t do it justice and I felt bad for Matt because unless he wanted to crash the car he couldn’t witness them with me. But I loved them, and I am very thankful to him for that.

However, he did manage to see a few and enjoyed the drive up there, doing his weird giggle because of some weird car fanboy thing. He must be weird, he’s with me. And we got to hotel number two and had a rest trying to find somewhere to eat later. This was a struggle, because it all involved driving somewhere and finding parking. I found a Pizza hut in a little mall type thing so parking was like right next to it. But the problem is, not knowing where the fuck we are going. He was swearing, I was incorrectly reading google maps. It was a mess. But we made it through. And I guess that is the most important thing. Coming out of shit times still happy together. Well to be fair it’s not like he could just abandon me in Scotland. Or could he… I better be on my best behaviour.

After food, we came back to the Travelodge, and chilled out ready for our big day at the zoo. We got about 9.30 and was there until about 4. So big day. The zoo was awesome, and it was peaceful to start with. I saw Zebras and Otters and Koalas and Pandas and Penguins and a tonne of Monkeys. And other animals of course. They even take some of the penguins around the zoo for a little walk and it was so cute. I took so many photos and little videos which I will snippet for you. Then of course we went in the gift shop, and I got myself a cuddle panda, obviously. And then a couple of gifts for the family.

As we finished earlier than we thought we decided to explore more of the city side of Edinburgh. We went into the local Primark and I got two cute new dresses. We went into a couple of random shops so I could get some gifts and just went on some walks. The view was so good. We stopped for some food and decided to head back, mainly because our phones were practically dead from all the picture taking. This wasn’t a good walk because I got very panicked about our phones dying and not finding our way back. Luckily Matt was there to be reassuring, not that I accepted this at the time. Thankfully, we survived to go back to our hotel and watch YouTube.

The next day we packed our things and headed into road trip number 3 the journey to Garmouth. Which is the closest place I could find to the dolphin centre. Guys driving on the motorways in Scotland is so good, purely through the views. So, make sure you are the passenger so you get to enjoy it. But literally every five minutes I look over like wow oh my god. Nature is just so beautiful sometimes. Aside from this the drive can be boring because I don’t have much to do. I’ve been singing along to songs. Making weird video clips in hopes of putting it together for a YouTube video. And writing some of this blog post.  I don’t know why but I am unable to nap. Which is mean because I love a good nap. However, if I fell asleep who would be there to tell Matt to turn but then get the turning wrong?  He does provide me with some entertainment bless him, but most of the time he is concentrating to protect us from death. So, I think I’ll take boredom over that.

Now I’ve noticed this is a very long post, so I thought, lets make this a too be continued.

If you’d like to find out about our Dolphin trip, Scarborough adventures, and if we make it home in one piece, please check back in next Thursday.

See you when I see you! 

Gossip Girl.

Gossip girl here. And today I will be talking to you about everything Gossip Girl. Now I know that it is not completely relevant anymore considering the finale was back in 2012. But I have only recently discovered it on Netflix. I mean I have heard of the show before a day Hariette had given me a partial spoiler before I even decided to watch it, but I went from having no interest to being a bit obsessed. So I thought I would give some opinions.




WARNING: May include spoilers! 




So at first I wasn't too invested in anything, because I saw it as a serious I could just have on in the background when doing other things. Then around the end of season 1 I noticed myself caring about certain things more than I should. Mainly the Dan and Serena relationship. And the whole shit with Georgina. And you sit there thinking how much an idiot Serena is for not telling Dan the truth. Then in season two they get back together but break up. And they yoyo so fucking much that you get so enraged. They end it with them getting married, which is cute and appeals to my ship love, but in all honest towards the end Dan was such a dick to her, which made her be a bit of a bitch to him in return, and I honestly do not think that is a healthy relationship.

Nate annoys me the most for this because he goes from Blair to Serena back to Blair, to Jenny to Vanessa to some random old lady who plays Betty's mom in RiverDale.  Back to Vanessa back to Jenny all the way back to Blair. With some random girl who I recognise from a show but can't remember what. Then gets back with Serena, and Jenny appears again. Make up your fucking mind! And then it just keeps going. Trish from Harper's Island, Weird posh lady, Charley but not Charley, Charley but Lola. Wait.. Charley and Lola was that meant to represent the children's book? I doubt it. I only just thought about it. Anywho. Nate needs to get tested. Well he did in one episode to be fair.

To be fair they all fucking get around in this show. I want to draw a map of all the relationships that go on. That is the only thing that made me happy about the final episode. All my ships came back together. Chuck and Blair finally concluded their tortuous roller-coaster off again on again, and got married and had a little boy who is so darn cute. Some elements of their relationship did go a bit extreme though, like when she got kidnapped by that guy who had a vendetta against Chuck. To be fair most of the storylines with Chuck were extreme. His father dying, his uncle being an ass to take the company, Lily adopting him to let the uncle not take the company, the evil guy trying to take the company, being shot, pretending he was someone else, finding out his mum was actually alive, getting into a car crash, turns out someone else was his real mother, finding out that they pretended to be his real mother, thinking it was because his uncle was his father, turns out it's because his dad faked his own death, accidentally murdering his father because his dad was trying to kill him. You know everyday life. At least he looked good doing it all.

Chuck was by far my favourite character, even though he started off as a dick, but I think it was his turn around that made him all that more awesome. But then again there was Darota. Who was simply amazing all the time. It's probably why so many thought it would be her that was gossip girl. And I think if it wasn't already spoiled for me that Gossip Girl was indeed Gossip Guy then I'd have thought that too. It would be far better than who it really was.

That being...Dan. Which when I watched the first episode I thought it would be Dan, and then as the serious progressed I turned off this idea. Why? Because it became too obvious to me. He was a writer, and even wrote a book about them all in a similar style to gossip girl. So it being Dan was not shocking enough for me. And even though I hated Nate I would have preferred it to be him because towards the end he was trying to really find out who gossip girl was and they always went on about how he never sent in any tips, and it was like, because I was Gossip Girl, and the others would be like, So why are you trying to find out who you are? Which to be fair is the ultimate cover up.

To conclude, I feel empty, because the drama is over and the result is disappointing. Much like Pretty Little Liars. And I want to find a new series to watch but I fear the same investment and being let down at the end will just keep occurring. But if you have any suggestions feel free to give them to me.

You know you love me.
XOXO Gossip Girl.

A Music Tag.

Hello, so this is probably something I haven't done in a while, a tag! So you should all thank Siobhan for posting this tag first (which you can read here) and providing me with the idea to do this myself. From what I made out they are two separate tags based around music. And I love music. So why the fuck not? I've merged them together though so enjoy my answers!

1). A song that would play during a zombie apocalypse movie:

     If it's like the kind of grungy trying to get by part of the Zombie apocalypse I'd go with "Wasps" by The Red Paintings.

2). A song that reminds you of a special place:

     I wouldn't say I really had a special place but whenever I hear "Happy Together" by The Turtles I always  montage the happy times in my mind so I guess that counts. Or "Somewhere Only We Know" by Keane.

3). A song you'd like to kiss to: 

    Well assuming I was kissing Matthew, I'd want to play anything That Poppy because it would annoy him, and he's very cute when he's annoyed, but more seriously it would either be "Shout about it" or "Risk it all" both by The Vamps.

4). A song that you'd get the lyrics of tattooed on yourself: 

     "We are like Young Volcanoes" with a little drawing of a volcano, from the song "Young Volcanoes" by Fall Out Boy. Just because it would be super cute, and it's one of my favourite songs. Or it would be "What would I give if I could live, out of this water" from "Part of Your World" The Little Mermaid, so I can have Ariel tattooed on me. 

5). A song that reminds you of a fictional character: 

     Well Melanie Martinez's "Mad Hatter" reminds me of Alice in wonderland, but I'm not sure that counts because it is partially what the song is based off of. 

6). A song that was your anthem in middle school:

     Wow, I don't remember much of Middle School. I know I loved Black Eyed Peas, "Where is the Love?" being a classic. I also loved Lily Allen and Avril Lavigne. The usual suspects.

7). A song that reminds you of your best friend: 

    "Bohemian Like You" The Dandy Warhols.

8). A song that would play during the movie trailer of your life:

     "Everything's Just Wonderful" by Lily Allen, because some lyrics are just very applicable. 

9). A song you cry to:

     "Never Be Alone" Shawn Mendes.

10). A song you drive to:

       "Alone Together" Fall out Boy, or "Irresistible"

11).A song that reminds you of your childhood:

     "Numa Numa" by Dragostea Din Tei. Still one of the greatests.

12). Your favourite song from last year:

        "Tag You're It" Melanie Martinez.

13). A song that reminds you of your favourite season:

      "Sunny Afternoon" The Kinks, which you think mainly about Summer, but it can still be linked to Spring which is my favourite season.

14). A song by an artist you're crushing on: 

       "Treat you Better" Shawn Mendes.

15). A song with a colour in the title: 

       "Ultraviolet" The Stiff Dylans. Fell in love with it since Angus, Thongs and Perfect Snogging.

16). What are your favourite 5 songs right now? 

       This is so difficult. 

        "It's Not A Side Effect Of The Cocaine, I'm Thinking It Must Be Love" by Fall Out Boy.

        "Lowlife" ThatPoppy

        "I'm Not Okay (I Promise)" My Chemical Romance

        "Stacey's Mom" Fountains of Wayne

        "Mr Brightside" The Killers.

17).What is the most played song on your itunes? 

      I don't have iTunes, but my most played song is probably something Fall Out Boy. 

18). What song are you listening to right now? 

       "Everybody's Fool" by Evanescence.

19). What was the last album you bought? t

       I don't think I have ever actually purchased an album.

20). What was the last gig you went to? 

      It was a small fundraiser gig at the Brickmakers, Mainly went to hear Enigma. 

21). What song can you not get out of your head? 

       "Well since I mentioned it "Numa Numa"

22). What song do you listen to everyday? 

     Most of the ones I have already mentioned.

23). What was the first album you ever bought? 

       Again don't think I have ever actually purchased an album.

24). What was the last single you downloaded? 

       "Treat you Better" Shawn Mendes.

25). What is your favourite band right now? 

       It will always and forever be Fall Out Boy.

26). Who is you favourite artist right now?

       Male- Shawn Mendes

       Female- Melanie Martinez

Two very different artists.

27). What is your favourite type of music?

       As Matthew likes to remind me I have a very mismatch of music. I go from pop to rock to quite dark shit. Basically my favourite type is good music. And that tends to be a lot more when I have alcohol/get in the party spirit. 

28). In your 25 most played songs what is number 10? 

       "Milk and Cookies" Melanie Martinez. 

29). Quote one of your favourite lyrics.

       "Take a piece of my heart, and make it all your own. So when we are apart, you'll never be alone." from "Never Be Alone" by Shawn Mendes.

30). Do you listen to music everyday?

       If not on my phone or laptop, I definitely sing it in my head. 

So that was an eventful tag. A fun distraction from what I am supposed to be doing. But as I always say it is why we are here. See you when I see you!

How I Like My Hair.

You can tell I'm running out of things to talk about can't you. But to me my hair is a very big deal. Because it's the basis of whether or not I think I look good. And people can tell me otherwise, doesn't change how I feel.

I think it comes from my face shape. Because sometimes my face can look really fat and round but if my hair is in a certain it looks nice and angled. I mean sometimes it can also be a filter I use or the actual position of the camera. But most of the time I find if I move my fair I look better.

If you've known me a while you'll know I've essentially had the same hairstyle since I was in my last year of middle school. Essentially being a side fringe parted on my left side and length mainly around my shoulders. I tend to hate having my hair up, because of the fringe not flowing properly without the support of the rest of my hair (which I do preferred to be layered and somewhat voluminous) but since I have to wear it up for work I do grow to like it a bit more. As long as my fringe is not tied back. I'm not entirely sure why. I think it's mainly lyrics due to me hating my eyebrows with a passion. Never stare at my eyebrows. So by always having one partially covered up it makes them less noticeable. Plus when you tie it back I get the weird pokey put bits of my ponytail.

Sometimes I just hate the ponytail because of how it waves  and the way my hair has to cling to my skull, highlighting my weird head shape. So sometimes I have to loosen it a bit, but then it goes bumpy. It's a struggle. You can tell I'm running out of things to talk about can't you. But to me my hair is a very big deal. Because it's the basis of whether or not I think I look good. And people can tell me otherwise, doesn't change how I feel.

I think it comes from my face shape. Because sometimes my face can look really fat and round but if my hair is in a certain it looks nice and angled. I mean sometimes it can also be a filter I use or the actual position of the camera. But most of the time I find if I move my fair I look better.

If you've known me a while you'll know I've essentially had the same hairstyle since I was in my last year of middle school. Essentially being a side fringe parted on my left side and length mainly around my shoulders. I tend to hate having my hair up, because of the fringe not flowing properly without the support of the rest of my hair (which I do preferred to be layered and somewhat voluminous) but since I have to wear it up for work I do grow to like it a bit more. As long as my fringe is not tied back. I'm not entirely sure why. I think it's mainly lyrics due to me hating my eyebrows with a passion. Never stare at my eyebrows. So by always having one partially covered up it makes them less noticeable. Plus when you tie it back I get the weird pokey put bits of my ponytail.

Sometimes I just hate the ponytail because of how it waves  and the way my hair has to cling to my skull, highlighting my weird head shape. So sometimes I have to loosen it a bit, but then it goes bumpy. It's a struggle. I did wear my hair in a full pony tail around London, and I'll be honest I didn't completely hate it. Trying to take a nice photo though was irritating. Since my hair has grown longer I had started to learn to plait my hair in fun ways. But the way my hair looks against my hair does put me off. I like to have a change. I want to have a change. But to me the only logical solution is to have a new face shape.

I've considered going back to a full fringe like in my early youth, because a side fringe is too much upkeep to look nice all the time. But I have this fear of it getting cut wrong. And I've cried at getting my hair cut before. It's what started the Alice band phase. And we are not going back to that. But I just don't know what to do about the length of my hair. Because I can really like how it looks long  it just gets quite heavy and weirdly wavy. But I could never go too short because then it doesn't frame my face right. Even though short hair was my mum's favourite look on me.

This is a wig, don't be scared. 

I don't know. I think I should just stick with what I know. As I remember in middle school I so desperately wanted a side fringe I would just take a section of hair and seperate it, despite it being the same length. But I do fear sticking with it makes me boring. Much like this post.  Which I am only writing because I am bored whilst sat on a train. Hence it's weird structure, poor grammar, and large amounts of what the fuck is going on. But thank you for sticking with me. See you when I see you!