The Cursed Week.

The events of the past several days has lead me to label this The Cursed Week. Not necessarily the bad things happening to me, but just a sense of what else could go wrong, what else could make everything more stressful. 

As you have probably seen from my recent blog posts that I'm not really in the best of places. Don't get me wrong I am getting happier and trying to distract myself from the stress. But that doesn't really deal with the problems. They are still there. And I struggle knowing what to do with it. Because most of it comes from work, and I don't know what I can do. As I love it there, usually, and this is what I want to do in future, so leaving will just make things more complicated. But this very moment in time work sucks. 

We all work long hours, get moaned at for the little things we do wrong but never get praise for the mass amounts of effort we put in. Which then in some vicious cycle leads to us getting more things wrong, or making ourselves ill so we don't go to work making everyone else more stressed. Last week in particular was just stupid. Photo day at the nursery is a crazy day on it's own because the children go crazy when not in routine. But add to that the fact 4 members of staff were not in. It was a nightmare. Then a friend had to go home because she was having pains and everyone worked pretty much the whole time the nursery was open. And for me and a few others the work doesn't end there, because I come back to do coursework. Which I think management fail to remember. 

Then when the staff returned the next day it is like they failed to appreciate the good things we did. So the mood goes down, and things go wrong. So I was already wanting to give up by Wednesday. Which has become a pattern now. We are not even going to discuss the events of Thursday but it lead to a few of us at work just bursting into tears. It just made me thankful that Friday for me was a half day, so I actually got time to relax. 

As the new week has started I am worried that the cursed week will still haunt us. Yeah it's not been as bad in terms of incidents, but we have all still been working ridiculously long hours. We still don't get thanked for that. We still don't get appreciated for the good things we do. We still feel so physically and mentally drained that we don't want to do anything. So then we get stressed because we have other commitments in our lives. But what am I meant to do? Because right now I see no hope in it getting better, but as I said before, if I leave before finishing my qualification I've gone through all that for nothing. 

Wish me luck, and I promise I will try to be more upbeat in my next post. See you when I see you!