Listen Here You Little Shiet

Sorry about the title sounding like I am calling you a little shit, but there is method behind the madness. Today I am staying over at Jessie's house so this is as good a time as any to talk about my beloved friend. Basically the title refers to what she says to me sometimes, as well as her idea for a blog which she is never going to publish. 

Jessie, Jess, Jass, Jasstopher Pippin Head Boy at Charlington High School. Would you like to here my theme tune? WUBWA! Isn't it amazing (jeeves) would be the person I class as my best friend. But I don't cause she is more like a sister. My mum has even decided to name her as her daughter so she is practically family. 

 

In year 8 I first encountered this wonderful creature, but all was not good for she didn't like me too much. Which I don't blame her for cause I was a dick. However, she was in my P.E. class, and when getting changed (yes stripping down is always the best way to make a friend) we found the first of many common interests. The Natural Confectionery Advert. Our Favourite being the Snail Jiggle which you can watch in the video located to the right of this typing. This was the start of everything and sometime Jass and I consider writing in to tell them how grateful we are. 

Things I love about Jessie:
We are practically inseparable
She too is obsessed with Snails, Unicorns, Rainbows, Teasets and My Little Pony.
She pulls the best faces when having her picture taken.
She thinks there is a secret hot tub on the roof of our school.
Her songs she knows about nuggets in biscuits
She isn't afraid to be herself
She treats me as though my weirdness is normal
We have the same taste in breakfast food. CRUMPETS.
She likes being painted like one of those French Girls
How she knows what I am thinking.
She is hilarious
Her overall self pretty much.
 The beauty that is my crumpet, is possibly the best friend you could ask for. Yeah we have had our arguments but when I need her she is their with her jokes and strangeness to make me smile. I don't think I could have got through the last year if it wasn't for her. But seeing her cry makes me cry, which in turn makes her cry so we end up in a big tearful mess, which always end when we watch some pewdiepie. She also tells it how it is, so when I need a slap round the face for being hysterical she will provide it. Sometimes maybe even literally.

 

After 4 years you would have thought we have driven each other insane, but we haven't. So instead we share our weirdness with the world in the form of our youtube channel unicornsoftherainbow. Then there is the many photos of us in onesies just pulling derp faces, and weird sitting positions. But we don't care what people think of us, if they actually do think anything. For we are Butt in Tent! <3 I really do not know what I would do without my Jassums, we plan to live together and make our house the place of wonder, that not even Alice could have found, and still be sane. And all of our adventures shall be shared with the world, either with this blog or some other form of communication. So look forward to that. See you in the 'morrow!

The Magnificent 7- Confectionery

So I am a massive fan of the land of sweets and chocolate. Which is bad for you I know, but I don't it sweets that much, I try to have them in moderation. But that doesn't stop me from having 7 favourites. Therefore, this blog is clearly about that. You really need to start reading the titles. Mainly it's chocolate, cause chocolate kicks ass. Here goes!

7. See the Rainbow, Taste the Rainbow! Obviously Skittles.

How people cannot like Skittles I will never know. With most coloured objects I become a little OCD and have to organise them into coloured groups. When I am on my own duh. Others cannot ruin my rainbow fun. Then I either eat my least favourite colour first, or grab one from each and shove them all in my mouth to officially taste the Rainbow. Like most people, I think, My favourite Skittle are the Purple ones. However, unlike the rest of the confectionery on this list I am not completely addicted. So Seven! (Said in the voice of Len Goodman from Strictly cause that is the only way to say the number Seven from now on)

6. This would have to be the wonderful...Ferrero Rocher. That little treat you

can only have every so often because they are so fucking expensive! But their delicousness is worth it, most of the time. I love hazelnuts so that is probably why I love this thing, that I had to google how to spell, so much. However my problem is once I eat one I have to eat another, so my money is wasted in about 5 minutes. The trick for me is to hide them, so then I forget and find them a few days later and scoff my face then.

5. Mini Eggs would have to go to number 5, cause they are seasonal. However, luckily for me we live in a world where shops start selling seasonal things months before their time, so MINI EGGS ARE BACK! I love hoarding mini eggs for the year. Well I tell myself to hoard them and just end up eating them by the end of May. :'( But these little chocolatey shells shaped like eggs are so good. If you offer me one I couldn't resist. Much like the rest of the list actually. 

4. Goes to the wonderfulness of MAOAMS! The ongoing war of how they

are actually pronounced continues. To me it is like a Moaw like a cat followed by Ams. MOAWAMS! They are probably my favourite sweet like thing, even though I'm not quite sure exactly what they are. Just a fruity chewy glob strip. I should be their campaign manager. But I love eating strips of Maoams and instead of just shoving it into my face I eat it slowly, nibbling away. The best ones are the red&blue combination. I have no idea what flavour this is, but it is the best.

3. MamamamamamamamaMagic Stars! That's

magic stars if you have trouble understanding what that was. Magic Stars are so good. Milky Chocolatey Heaven. The little faces are also adorable. There's AngryMan, ConfusedGuy, HappyChappy, CoolDude, KeziaFace and the Baby. All cause they are what they look like. Kezia face, for the confused bunch, is the one wearing glasses making a... how can I show this in typing?...umm. Ugh forget it, but this face reminds me of my friend Kezia so KeziaFace. 

2. The incredibly addictive M&M's. They are so good, and

way better than Smarties. Sorry Smartie fans. There is something about them that just makes me crave them constantly and just eat until there is nothing left. However they are also coloured so I cannot have any until they have been organised. Then I eat my least favourite colour to my favourite, cause you always save the best 'til last. 

1. I have mentioned this so many times on my blog. Terry's Chocolate

Orange. The only way I like orange flavouring in chocolate. Terry you are a pure genuis and I love you. You are like my Ben and Jerry, however their ice-creams are to die for. Especially the Core one with the Cookie Dough and the fudge and it's all just so...but back to TCO. The fact that they look like segments of oranges just amazes me, and they are so addictive I'm all like I HAVE TO EAT THIS ENTIRE THING NOW! Crap now I want some TCO. Fuck this list! 

That was all, and all was that. See you in the 'morrow!

The Frustration Station

Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. Hello. 

Hello. 

Was that annoying? 

So who likes my title? I do, I spent fucking ages coming up with that genius there, so appreciate it! Why The Frustration Station I hear none of you ask because you are not here, however if I could hear you ask that would be pretty creepy. Moving on... Today has been filled with a few frustrating things and station rhymes and you know how I like a good rhyme. Like I said not everything was frustration central I had a good lay in this morn' and followed it up by playing yet more My Little Pony. It is incredibly addictive. Then I got ready and went to 6th Form.

And it was fucking freezing. If I had balls they probably would have went up inside me just to stay warm. That sentence was not needed, but it shall stay cause I can't be bothered to go back and delete it. That my friends requires effort. So I had to trek along Middleton's Lane to get to school and by the time I got there I was a mixture of boiling and freezing, which is the trippiest feeling in the world, so my first frustration hit. I make it sound like drugs, maybe it is drugs. I'm quite scatty today. BACK ON TRACK! So I sat with Siobhan talking about psychology until the triplets arrived and we were talking about Biology which I had recently sat a mock mock in. Yes mock was supposed to be written twice, it was a mock test of a mock test. And I was all I feel pretty confident I did well like not A but maybe a good B. Oh Elli so naive, so stupid. After this I was being ignored by Claire and Co and I cried. :'( 

Now was Biology and to begin we learnt a few things (really Elli you learnt stuff in school, never would have guessed) about amino acids which again I understood. But then I got off at frustration station again, as I found out I got a D. Or for the dirty minded 'the D' and I almost cried cause I really don't want to fail Biology. Mainly cause then I have to retake the entire year and I don't want to do that cause it will just be ARg! Apparently many people did bad on that test, and it was only a mock mock so I have about a month to buck up my ideas to be good for the real mock and about 4 months before the real exam. DUn DUn Dun. But yeah I failed and I am a failure. 

Luckily all I had today was Biology. But cause I love my friends a bunch, only cause I love my friends it wasn't cause I didn't want to wait ages in the cold for a bus or anything, I stayed for mentor time, which is essentially lunch unless you have mentor, which I didn't, so lunchtime. When Claire dropped me off at Frustration Station yet again. She all of a sudden brought up an idea for what to do for her birthday WHICH IS IN DECEMBER! I mean really Clive? She had the idea of having a shindig, yes that is what it must be called Claire, where you dress up as your favourite fictional character. And at first I was like Fine, Moriarty. But then I was like wait, there are so many characters I love which would be fun to dress up as. For example the various My Little Pony characters such as Apple Bloom or the Equestria Girls version of Rarity. Elli you seriously need help with this My Little Pony Shit. Then I started thinking wait what about The Powerpuff Girls or Sailor Moon or even Angela Anaconda, cause that show was amazing. So now for the next eleventy-twelve months I am going to be in this dilemma of WHAT THE FUCK DO I GO AS. So I left after saying my loving goodbyes and headed home.

A good part of my day was my old friend Scott told me that if I tell him the name of the guy I like he will give me £50, a botttle of Blue Vodka and 3 bottles of Turbo Tango. Which I think was a pretty good deal however at one point he offered me £150 so I wonder if I am being cheated. but I'm going to agree cause I mean it still is a good deal for one measly name which I could just make up. But probably wont. Cause I'm not mean. Hang on how much of this made me sound a bit like a prostitute? :/

I kind of stopped blogging then, not that you would have noticed, for a spontaneous Co-Op trip where mum said she'd buy us nice things (sweets and shit) but I craved Forrero Rocher but there were £4.69, ha 69. But that I thought was too much so I treated myself cause I have been pretty down lately so maybe this will give me a happy feel. Whoa that sounded perverted. 

So that was pretty much my day, My Little Pony and Frustration. So hopefully tomorrow will be My Little Pony and fun times. Cause My Little Pony is just my life now. See you in the 'morrow!

MY LITTLE PONY!

Twisted

A while ago during a lesson of Psychology my delightful husband Clark suggested that Clive and I watch this play/musical thing called Twisted: The Untold Story of A Royal Vizier. So I watched it cause she showed us the trailer and it looked good. If you have not already guessed this is a review post. I have added a youtube video of the production cause I really suggest you watch it cause I may spoil it for you. Just ensure you have a good 2 hours and 15 minutes spare. But it is all in one clip which I love cause you don't have to go through the annoying thing of transferring to different videos. Ugh don't you hate that? There is a lot of swearing so if you are young or just don't like bad language don't watch it. Anywho here is what I thought.

 It is a parody of most plays as well as Disney/Pixar Films. And I love a good parody, even if it takes the piss out of something I love. This is based on the story of Aladdin but from the point of view of Jafar, so obviously I love it cause he is one of the better villains. The point is that the story is twisted to make him look like the bad guy and then some point during the middley-end some other famous villains come out and talk about how their stories were twisted which I loved, cause the villains are amazing. 

The best thing about this was that it genuinely made me laugh with their jokes, there was one that took the piss out of Toy Story 2 and I love that film which is kind of why I found it funnier. Also the character of Aladdin was supposed to be sex obsessed and pretty much throughout he said that to sleep with a girl you use subliminal messaging and after every line who would go "take off your clothes" and everytime I laughed. He even turned it into a song. Some of the actors were just naturally funny as well.

I'm not going to say much cause it needs to be watched instead of just read about. Immediately I fell in love with the performance and wanted to watch it again, but at this point the last episode of Sherlock was about to come on and I couldn't miss that, especially with the ending which I am not going to spoil for those who have not watched it. But why haven't you seen it?  Anywho... At first I wasn't going to think I would love it as much as I did, cause I thought plays were a bit too tedious and meh, but this was no waste of time, and if you ever are bored on a weekend with nothing else to do and you think hmm, what to do, what to do? Watch Twisted. Seriously I almost died of laughter. 

 Man talking about it makes me want to watch it again, See you in the 'morrow!

The Genetic Disorder

This is probably never going to get posted but I'm going to write it down anyway, to make me feel better or some psychological shit like that. Basically this post is about the troubles of my life, well the main trouble. The Genetic Disorder. 

About 4 years ago, my granddad fell off a ladder and had to go to hospital. There they took some tests and eventually discovered he had Huntington's Disease. At first I didn't really understand it so didn't think much of it. Then I learnt more about how it was a genetic disorder and read a symptoms list my mum had and started believing I had it. Which is stupid. But I was naive and at that point in my life I felt like I needed to be punished for the way I had acted previously. But my mum being the voice of reason told me that there was a 25% chance of me having the disorder, cause it wasn't certain if she had it. So I pretty much dismissed the situation.

After a while though it all got brought up again, cause my mum and her brother had different views on the situation. It started with my mum wanting to get tested and thinking that Jeff should do the same, but he didn't agree. My mum had also told me and my sister everything she knew, but my uncle didn't even tell his kids that our granddad was ill. It was awful cause I wanted to talk to my cousin Hollie about it, I wanted to know her thoughts but I couldn't cause I wasn't allowed. When my mum's results came back positive, it became a little more serious and I wanted to know more. I wanted to talk to my sister about it, cause she's my sister I need her, but she wouldn't talk about it. My dad wouldn't mention it either. I mean we spoke about how it affected granddad but when it came to us nothing. 

I always spoke to my mum at first, asking questions about it to learn more, and she offered to take me to see her doctor who specializes with families who have genetic disorders. She refers to him as Lovely Doctor Simon. As you might have guessed Hal (my sister) refused to go which upset me cause I wanted her there, but I respect that if she wanted to talk about it she would. So I spoke with Lovely Doctor Simon and it went ok. I understood everything a little better, cause he told me if I had it I wouldn't get symptoms until the age my mum started (she's 48 now and nothing yet) so I was feeling ok. However he then told me the news that kind of broke me. I couldn't get tested until I was 18. This was last year when I was 15 and I freaked out, cause I really wanted to know whether I had it or not. Then my mum told me that I should wait until I was an adult, so that it doesn't ruin my life. But the not knowing is the constant pain. 

At this point I was pretty low, every morning I would be alone on the bus so would start thinking about all this going through my mind and trying to process it, and when I got to school I broke down in tears. It was pretty much everyday and I would have to go talk to my mentor, my head of year, and pretty much everyone. And talking about it only made it worse. Cause truth be told they thought my main worry was me having it. But it actually wasn't. I was worried for everyone around me, like my granddad, cause watching him sometimes it is heartbreaking, he can't talk properly sometimes, and he seems really sad cause he can't do a lot of the stuff he used to. Then I would worry about coming home and finding my mum had changed due to the disease, and I would have to try and cope with that alone cause Hal wouldn't talk to me. There is so much going on in my tiny little mind. 

Not only this but around the same time we found out my nanny had cancer. As it was also on my mums side I felt like if I was upset about it I couldn't talk to my mum cause she had it worse than me, she didn't need me talking about my worries. Eventually the school got me to talk to this teacher every week who was really a Councillor but she was like one. It was good cause she listened and understood things from my point and others and I felt a lot better, after a while I just went and spoke to her to take some time away from things, drinking tea, and missing P.E. However, problems kept piling up like my other granddad getting cancer, and the continuation of the communication on my family breaking down. I kept going to see Lovely Doctor Simon with my mum every now and then, and spoke to my teacher friend, and things started to look up again. 

There is another situation during last year that was awful. And it was a comment made from a very conservative friend. Sure everyone is allowed there opinion but there is a time and a place. So my friend Connor, knew about my family, and during a lesson of Biology we were learning about Evolution. This lead to a conversation about how Connor thinks that people have too many kids and eventually it will lead to the world starving. So I said that I wouldn't mind dying so others can survive and Connor said he would hypothetically kill the weaker part of the species like you. And I was like what do you mean, and he pointed to my Huntington's Disease Youth Organisation Bracelet. That was a serious no go. Cause me fine, but my mum and my granddad deserve to live more than some of the cunts who live out there. He realised this bugged me and tried to make it better by saying his family also suffered illness, but still. At first it wasn't a massive issues, but the more he tried to defend himself the more it blew up in his face. He started talking about ecological factors and more non-sense that I stopped listening to cause he drove me to the point of wanting to kill him. But we don't talk about it anymore and I tend to stay away from his conservative bullshit. 

In that paragraph I mentioned Huntington's Disease Youth Organisation. This was probably one of the best things about everything. I would speak to interesting people who were in my situation and it made me feel a whole lot better. There I felt like no-one is alone going through stuff. From there things got better cause my uncle had finally told my cousin about granddad and I told her that if she wanted to talk she could talk to me or go on the website. I didn't want to pressure her cause it might upset her, that is also why I never mention it to Hal either. To this day neither of them have spoken to me, and that sucks. But I guess they deal with stuff in their own way, and I deal with it in mine.

For the past 5 months I have rarely thought about all of the things I used to worry about cause I had the distractions of my friends. It was amazing cause I look back and it felt like a lifetime ago, cause I am so happy. Well was so happy. It's swept over me again to be honest. The worrying and the eagerness to be 18 so I can finally be tested. I don't want to start mentioning it again to my friends cause I don't want to bring them down with me. However, I think they are going to notice mainly cause when I'm alone I think about it, and the other day on the late bus I did and I cried a little, but when people ask me I just sweep it under the carpet. I spend so much time talking about my problems, and I don't want people to worry about me. So I just put my happy face on and try to forget, and sometimes it works, and others it is just a mask. It may not be healthy but why upset everyone, when it is much easier just to cry on my own unnoticed. 

This genuinely made me feel slightly better. Whether or not I post it is going to be a weird one. I don't want to feel attention seeking but I don't know, thinking that somebody out there is reading this and offering help is comforting. So maybe. Maybe. Obviously if you are reading this then it means I have posted it. The only reason that is, is cause I have actually spoken to someone and it made me feel slightly better so maybe sharing it on a wider scale should improve, but hey you never know until you try. And if you read it all thanks for staying through to the end, I know it was a lot of me droning on. I may post more about the continuation of my journey, hopefully it would get better. See you in the 'morrow, hope I haven't completely put a downer on you day, night, whatever.

Socially Anti-Social

I don't know why but I get the feeling just writing about my day isn't very interesting. Maybe I need to be more inspirational of something like that. But the idea of someone aspiring to be like me is just Why? There are so many amazing people, what's this 16 year who basically does nothing with her life have that people crave. However, I'm going to post about my day cause I enjoy reading it back in a month or so and be like, omc that was hilarious. So this was my Fridyay. Yes I call it Fridyay, cause it's like yay weekend!

Anywho, I was awoken at 6:45 but didn't leave my bed until 7:10, I was incredibly lazy this morning. This led to me not being ready for my usual bus so I got the 8 o'clock one, really I did this so I could sneak in some My Little Pony gameplay. Sidenote: I got Amy addicted! The Ponyness shall spread! So I got on the bus and got about 3 phonecalls from Clark asking where I was, but I ignored them cause I literally walked through the school gate and couldn't be bothered. So I got to psycholology and she was like "Where were you?" and I was like "On a bus where were you?" cause I was on a bus...yeah. 

PSYCHOLOGY! Jonesy told us we had to pair up to conduct an experiment on acute stress and I went with Clive and she wouldn't accept any of my suggestions. I was saying things like stab people or throw them off a cliff. And she was like that's illegal, then Sir told us the only ethical issue: we should avoid death, so I suggested kidnapping. THAT DOESN'T LEAD TO DEATH. Most of the time. And she was all like no. Then complained at me cause we got no work done. Make your own suggestions Clive I raised you to be independent! And she came up with an idea and wrote it down while I made an origami farm. Well farm more like a huge ass cattat, a doggywoggy, a booterfly and a baneh. Best farm ever.

Another wonderful part about psychology was the 5 minute break, I left earlier then Clive and Clark, cause they were taking too long, then I was heading back and saw them coming through the window next to the door leading to the common room. So I ducked down and waited. Clive walked through first and I stroked her leg as she walked past. Then it was a small screaming dominoes. Clive, Clark then my laughter. Then Clark pulled me into the toilets and 2 minutes later questioned why we were in there. CAUSE YOU DRAGGED ME IN THERE!

Then there was break and all I remember was buying a chocolate bar for 40p and sitting on Claire's lap. Oh and questioning where my Jassums was. She was in graphics :'(

So Lish and I walked to our lessons together and met Jessie on the way. Lish left to go to umm crap what did she have? It was either Travel and Tourism or Business. It was Travel and Business. A weird ass mash up. And Jessie and I went to media, where we watched QI and spoke about theories for audience responses and there was one called the magic bullet and Jessie in her notes wrote magic buffet. I mean aren't all buffet's magical. And then not much else really happened. Apart from hearing the Galmeister talk about Twerking. 

Lunchtime now with the anti-social bunch. First Claire was reading and I just gave her the look of "Bitch put that book down or I shall shove it up your butt." Then Amy started playing on Candy Crush and I was like what is the point? But her phone started to die. That is what you get for being anti-social. However Amy left and Siobhan and I started reading a play Mojo it was messed up. WHAT THE FUCK WAS GOING ON? I chose to be the character who got the weirdest lines, but I suppose if I read the whole thing I may like it. Maybe. The Siobhan left with pretty much everyone so I was left with Claire, Ems, and Momo. Claire continued to read so I was talking to Em and Giancarlo about...um...I can't remember. But there was one thing Giancarlo said that killed us both. This is how it went.

Momo: "My face hurts."
Me: "Why?"
Momo: "Cause I was cycling."
Me: "Why were you cycling?"
Momo: "Cause I was walking." 

Even writing that has made me burst out into ridiculous laughter. Then Ems and I went to Biology and we learnt about amino acids and I actually understood it. I was amazed. But that was only for an hour so I went to the common room and saw Claire, still reading. So I was a little bit mean and googled the book to find a summary and read the ending so I know what happens. However by the times she reads this she has probably finished so there is no point for a spoiler alert. Then Amy and Emmi joined us and we had a conversation about My Little Pony and Emma said she might get it and I was like Yay spread the ponies! Then Claire went to the toilet and I turned into a mean. I moved her book mark, after remembering her actual pagenumber, to a page she had already read. But on the late bus she was like, I can't read anymore but I needed her to, if not it wouldn't work, and me and Amy were giggling away as she got out her book and was reading through the page to find out where she was and she got angry at me cause she realised. I only do this cause I love you Clive! The rest of the late bus journey was just random conversations about Sarah Jane Adventures, The Dumping Ground and Waterloo road. 

Now I am home, playing more My Little Pony and watching youtube, so you know the usual. See you in the 'morrow!