Stressing Out.

Hey guys, so this is going to be a quick post, because of what the title states. I'm stressed out. Maybe is the links with my arrival into adulthood, maybe it's about how I know people who speak before thinking leading to disastrous consequences, or maybe it's because I just overthink those things. Who knows fully what the cause is. I know more recently my stress is coming from work. I'm contracted to do 40 hours a week but I'm there more like 50 and for me work doesn't end at work, because when I get home I have to do coursework to pass my level 3 and it's like they don't think about that or try to help me in any way and I'm just a bit sick of it.

Time for me is a very worrying factor, and it's not that I'm not organised, I have an action plan of what aspects of coursework I want to complete by when, and it's very manageable. But the problem is it's not, because I am exhausted. All of the time. And it's making my social life pretty shitty because I want to go hang out, go out, and I then panic that I am too tired and would have work early or there is a mountain of coursework left to complete. Which annoys me. Because as much as I do enjoy being at work. It's not my life.

It's a difficult situation at work at the minute which is why I think everyone is stressed out, but it feels like no-one is trying to boost the moral of the team. I've gotten to the point of finding it very difficult to motivate myself to actually get out of bed and go to work at the minute. And I hope it will sort itself out eventually, because this is not the life I signed up for. But right now I don't see anything changing to make me happier.

This is why my blog post has been lacking recently. Which I really hate because to me this is my escape and distraction from things that stress me out. But I guess I am trying to be responsible in the sense that I know blogging will take time away from doing productive things like coursework or from sleeping. Both things I probably need to do more. So I'm sorry about that. I am trying at least. Maybe that's my problem. I try to do so many things, please so many people. Would it be better to just be selfish and think about myself?

I don't know. But I do know that I will see you when I see you!